***thinking on paper***
we are unsure of it we will have 1 more child or not. i think i want to, kipp is happy with 3 but i think he could be persueded into having a 4th.
what are some pros and cons of large families??? i came from a family with only 2 kids (i have one sister) and i always wanted a bigger family.
i also have the dayhome right now, so i have an 18 month old full time, mon-fri so i know can "do" 4 kids... but in reality, can i? can we?
pros
--one more amazing child to love, obviously! enough said!!
--i love the whole large family thing later in life, as well as when the kids are growing up... i just always have wanted a big family.
--nice equal number... my friend with 4 said it's actually "easier" than 3.... the kids pair up. hmmm....
--by the time we had another, my oldest would be in school FT (grade 1) and kai in kindergarten... does that make me less busy or more busy?!?? LOL
--i think i would finally feel done with 4. 3 i just feel unsure of being done, 4 would take the cake. ;) LOL again
--no need to upgrade home or vehicle!
--hand me down clothes from both genders, so we're set! (from here onward ... i have gotten rid of everything baby sized already)
cons
--more costs (food later on, clothes, post secondary education, sports activites)
--right now each child has their own room, a 4th would mean 2 have to share but not a big deal in my opinion
--less attention on each child???
--do i really want to have another year of no sleep?? (we lucked out with emmy, she was a great sleeper... kai on the other hand, was not)
--pregnancy weight gain (i had trouble losing it last time -- and thus far i have gained 5 permenent pounds per child)
--stuck in the baby stages for a bit longer when we're almost out of them
--possibility of having another child with swallowing dysfunction??
--we already got rid of our baby clothes, baby "gear", etc. except for the crib! (but all of the above can be found second hand for cheap!)
--would mean i couldn't really do dayhome... well maybe keep the one FT i have but otherwise, no. or just not until the older kids are in school FT.
hmmmm ???? why is this so tough???? it was much easier with the other kids.... they just came along and it was all perfect. am i putting too much thought into things? not enough thought?
also, if we have one more, do we have it sooner or lateR? sooner would be good for many reasons, but later is also appealing. AAAAAAHHHHHHHH
***thinking on paper -- over***
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11 comments:
It's a tough choice to make. Good luck with it!
I have no advice, just wanted to let you know that I am exactly where you are now (only with #3) and it's a tough decision! Plus I don't think my husband can be convinced to have another...
Good luck making your choice! I wish there was some easy way to figure this stuff out.
We're a family of 6. Trust me - as easy as the transition from 2 to 3 was, the transition from 3-4 is a cakewalk. It was the transition from 1 to 2 that killed me...
The most important thing to remember is that the jump from 3 to 4 kids means you are married to an giant vehicle for a very long time. Minivans, gas guzzling sport utilities, or busses. Whee!
Well the transition from 2-3 has about driven me off the deep end. I am in the van for at least an hour everyday. 10min to school at 8:15, 10 min home, 10min at 11:45 for kindergarten, 10 min home, and then 10 min at 2:45...and 10 min home. And this is just school runs, not all of the other things life throws at me...lol. The baby is so used to the van..I feel bad for her, it seems as though she is always facin' backwards...starin' at the headrest ;) ...
But I do know that you are an amazing Mom Tasha, and if anyone had the patience for 4, it's you.
With all the stuff you've gone through with Emerson and you want to have another one? Then I say go for it.
I think you probably know in your heart if you should have 4th or not. You are just working it out and making sure. I wish we could have a 3rd but I am going to enjoy the 2 that I have. :)
Well Tasha, you make such wonderful and beautiful children so (you know where I am going with this!) Just kidding. Don't go on with the swallowing function thing, I know it *could* happen again...but so *could* so much other things, TRUST me...I know. A child is a true blessing regardless if the child isn't in the best of health. So yeah, there are many other things to consider too. No person is garanteed a perfectly healthy child, we just all hope for one. With that said, its up to you...but I think that (as said) you are a very capable mother and if you aren't feeling that 'complete' feeling then chances are, you aren't done. You have time to think, no rush...take care!
Do what your big heart desires. I would love to see you with four (partly because I want to see you pregnant!), it's a perfect even number. I on the other hand will be done after two.
Yeah - I wanna see you pregnant too. I'll even take you picture. Maybe we can rent you one of those manbellies... The I can get pictures of you AND Kipp preggers! Woot woot!
Honestly Tasha, it sounds like you have your mind made up already about what you want to do. I've heard you talking about #4 as long as I've known you. I think the only thing really holding you back right now are your reservations about Emmy's condition, and Kipp not being 100% on board. Someone else mentioned that you have time, so use it.
((((((((Tasha)))))))))
We have already talked about this and you know I am really no help because I can't even figure things out for myself!! :P
Well, I have always wanted four and so did my mum. She wished she had have had another one to make four. (There's three of us.) But I just don't know if I'll even make it to one!! Everything is so expensive in Australia atm. The price of housing just soared last year so I don't think I'll ever own my own home. You and Kipp on the other hand, own your own home so that makes it a big + in the positive column!!
I would worry about the tertiary education bit that you mentioned. It's great if kids can have the option of going to college/uni if they want to. But there are always scholarships or loans that they can pay off when they're done with studying.
I would also consider the travel thing. I LOVE travelling and I know you do to so would you still be able to do this as often with four?
Sorry, this is getting long! There are lots of things to consider but ultimately, I would secretly LOVE to see you with four as a few mentioned above!! But that's just me! You're a great mum and you seem pretty set up with all the hand-me-downs that you mentioned, plus you have your house/van etc. I say go for it! Really, what's one more in the grand scheme of things? When you go travelling in the future, (i.e. Cali!!) you're going to have to get two hotel rooms anyway so adding a fourth child to the mix isn't going to make too much of a difference cost wise I don't think.
Geez, I think I've almost convinced myself to have four kids now!! Just gotta find someone to have them with. Hmmmm......!
Good luck with the decision and whatever decision you make - three or four kids - will be the right one.
Luv ya lots xXx
PS One more thing to consider: you'll have to change your blog name to "Party of Six"!!
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